Rebirth.

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Monday, May 23, 2005
.::back::.

I know I know, its been a while since I last posted here a lot has happened(a lot!!!)---the lowest point of my life, the one-night escapade(still makes me laugh), new house,being as stubborn piece of bum at home and now I'm getting over the biggest mistake (regret) of my life. I can't fill all those blanks right now but I would some other time. I'm actaully a lot better now. And to all I was supposed to see this day but didn'tsee you guys... see you soon maybe sooner than you expect.This is still Matt13, the same crazy---maybe I've toned down--- bastard you know... Adios for now. peace.

Thought captured by matt13 at 06:10 pm.
In return, it liberated me.

voice out contemplations  

Monday, April 04, 2005
Puta(ng) Papers!

I am currently wasted from doing my nth term paper. My mind can't function anymore due to insufficient sleep---I had only three hours of it, fucking insomnia!!! I haven't eaten lunch and it's 1:40 in the afternoon. I just have to rant about it or i'll burst! I need to get a break now and clear my mind of all the random thoughts currently floating in my head. Have to go now and eat, i'm so hungry and I have to finish my paperz later...FUCK!!!

Thought captured by matt13 at 02:39 pm.
In return, it liberated me.

voice out contemplations  

Monday, March 07, 2005
::myth of ideas::

There is a finite knowledge (or so I believe there is) in our universe which we try to box in communicable terms and so is the invention of words. We even tried to box a specific idea into many different combination of letters and syllables such as synonyms yet we don't have exact terms for others and so we utilize metaphors and such (pathetic and inefficient if you would ask me). In this finite pool of ideas, we pick out a few word---maybe some profound ones like 'God' and 'existence'; highfaluting & superfluous word and just plain silly ones---and treat this as our own idea, yet it is just a rip off of something that is already there. Of all the permutations and combinations of this things how, we as a society, take a consensus and treat the commonalities we have as normal and everything else taboo and cast them out. We scrutinize these people that differs from us, yet in a sense, they are the innovators and pioneers that gives us a different perspective of what we are of what we have accomplished as a race. Come to think of it, those creatures who have high capacity to think are the ones who are called humans. What are you?

        

         Of all the words you know,
have you found a meaning to a single one of it?


Thought captured by matt13 at 10:54 am.
In return, it liberated me.

voice out contemplations  

Wednesday, February 23, 2005
::rockstars & pornstar::

I absolutely have to post this pics! The first photo was taken somewhere by my good friend, Eric (a great photojournalist for The La Sallian, the English news publication of DLSU). Isnt it a great pic? (I have to kiss major ass coz I havent asked for his permission ---yet---to post this).

 

No need for introductions,eh!?


 

Kitchie (right) was my classmate in artapre. Twas after she just quit from mojofly and before the whole huwag na huwag mong sasabihin phenomenon. She even performed in class, sweet---talk about an intimate gig. Barbie (of Barbie's Cradle), well, I just see her around in school. Shes so pretty (certified Chinita hot chick---in an unconventional, unique way). Theyre so cool and pretty in an Im-a-rockstar-girl-and i-can-play-the-guitar-well-kinda-way.

 

This one can win a Pulitzer!!

Shrek

He called this pic Shrek (absolute truth!)


Here is a rare photo of Bryan Barranda (a.k.a Dolphy, beautiful mind, Eddie Guerrero). It's been like two years since high school. This is what everyday lunch at Mcdo can do you. He is still an ABS-CBN freak---even sends his ideas to them now (truth). Dont you know wowowee and Bora? (well, no, not his idea, not a good idea for the matter).

I gotta hear (or whatever the correct term is) your comments for this...


 

 


Thought captured by matt13 at 12:00 pm.
In return, it liberated me.

thoughts provokeds (3)  

Tuesday, February 22, 2005
::A reflection on wonderment (paper)::

The mood of wonder. It is said that if you hold a coin in an arms length to the tip of the small dipper, you will block out more than 36 galaxies from view---it is like holding a part of the universe on your fingertips. Doesnt that give you a sense of wonder that you, a speckle (or even less than) in the shores of the universe has held a galaxy of galaxy on just the tip of you fingers? That is how I view wonder (or at least a facet of it, anyway).
There was a terrorist bombing just last week, Valentines Day in Ayala, Makati (and in two other parts of the country). The bomb exploded in a bus en route to Alabang. At exactly the same moment as that transpired, I was in Lawton, on a bus also en route to Alabang. I could only thank the heavens that I wasnt there, have pity for the victims and somewhere at the back of my mind, wonder what wouldve been the scenario now if it happened to me.
Wonder, then (at least for me), is a form of reality that is presented I a unique (sometimes strange way) as oppose to what is conventional and gives a new perspective on how we view things. Wonder, in this sense, gives us life that brings something new to what otherwise seems boring, routinely life.
Routine is not something that should be seen as bad but routine can be most of the times numbing and voids us of our spontaneity and zest. It can give us stress and can get on our nerves. In a sense, we live as machines toiling day in and day out without any form of growth (in both spiritual and intellectual aspects). Wonder, here, makes us cherish certain moments of our live, which, make us more human---like a birth of a child, a perfect rainbow or peace in the Middle East.
Carpe Diem. But what if we take it a little further than certain moments in our lives, and make each second a moment on its own. A man by the name of Michael Jordan once said that play each game as if it were your last. Live life at each moment of it. Reflecting on this, everything we do, everything that is, would be wonderful (the sense of wonder in everything). We replenish our lives with every breath (that in its self is a wonderful, miraculous event). And that makes me wonder why anyone would take his own life.
If we would only live life in each moment of it, for everything its worth, we would see life is such a wonderful state. When we think of trivial stuffs such as territory, religion, color of skin (and such), we see things in a convention (as conventional) and we lose the sense of wonder. Which would we rather choose? That is our own choice, which is for us to decide.

Thought captured by matt13 at 03:33 pm.
In return, it liberated me.

voice out contemplations  

Monday, February 07, 2005
.::I need a cool banner::.

Hopefully, I would be able to create a kick-ass banner for this thing by next week.
Of course, that would only be posssible after I finish:

the two papers in Sociology (Introso)  plus our group experiment paper.
reviewing for the mid-terms in Linear Algebra, Introso and Differential equations
our report in Curidev and Readcur, curriculum subjects.

Yes, I can just see it now...*sigh*...well gotta start working on these things...

Thought captured by matt13 at 07:15 pm.
In return, it liberated me.

thoughts provokeds (3)  

.::time missed::.

Okay, I guess I should post something that tells what the hell happened to me this past year since it's been that long since my last blogpost. Well, in the general perspective...GMA & Bush won, go figure; FJP has died---ironically, he gained my respect after he died, not in a hypocritical Gloria kinda way but in the deep sense that he (his life) is loved by totally millions. There were those super typhoons which struck our country one after another and then of course, the ten times more destructive Asian Tsunami. Iraq has held its first election after more than 50 years---apparently liberated by the Americans. As for me, its been one helluvayear. Our band Pardu had its first real gig, the band then joined some contests, didn't win but twas ayt---couldn't join on those performances (nothing implied there, ok?). I've also gone through the lowest point of my life where I almost lost all hope when all the problems came crushing down at me. Anyways, Ive bounced back, got my priorities straight is now living life (I guess). I've learned how to tune out the negative energy around me (although I could snap back sometimes---that is why there is this), to reflect on myself and appreciate my circle better. I've also gone through lotsa different views in life---from becoming a real mad man to a satara to an enlightened one. I have also learned to appreciate diversity. I'm still in a partly mad, jubilant, ecstatic, enraged, morose, defiant, thinker, lazy ass, deviant, loser, morbid, unpredictable, and unconventional kinda self.


Box me.



Thought captured by matt13 at 05:34 pm.
In return, it liberated me.

voice out contemplations  

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